Anyway, you know what else contains not one iota of natural ingredients? Revlon Super Lustrous Lip Gloss in Shine City!!!! Oh my gosh! Oh my GOSH!!!! I am so in love with this lip gloss. I know that recently I was touting L’Oreal Le Gloss in Naturally Nude as the perfect clear gloss, but Shine City is winning it this week because it is a very (very!) light pink (not noticeable as pink once you put it on) with flecks of glitter in it, and it gives you megawatt shine. I mean, both of these are awesome, especially for their price point, and it looks like Revlon is re-releasing their Super Lustrous series with SPF 15, which makes is double great. Also, for my less rosy lip gloss lovers, Revlon has an almost identical (though much harder to find) product called Sparkling Champagne with gold undertones, and it is similarly gorgeous.

Sigh…I really, really, REALLY love these lip glosses. But I feel like such a jerkwad buying them. I mean, under no circumstances are these products good for the environment or for animals being held captive in a laboratory. I know that. And I keep trying to get with some all natural, organic, vegan lip gloss and I keep running back to the makeup aisle at CVS, clutching a handful of Revlon to my chest and weeping in relief at being reunited.  It’s just that all natural lip gloss just does not deliver the same long lasting, high wattage shine. I know… I know… have I tried Burt’s Bees? Yes! Yes to Carrots? Yes! Zuzu? Yes! Arbonne? Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes! Trust me. You are lying to yourself if you think any of these delivers even half the bang as my babies above. My favourite all natural lip gloss, so far, is the stuff they make right here in Chicago at Mojo Spa, but I recently found out that the one I have been using for years has lanolin in it. I could have probably figured this out earlier if I’d actually read the ingredients, but you know, I see stars when it comes to lip gloss. It is a little bit arbitrary to avoid lanolin since I still wear wool, but I am, you know, a little bit arbitrary in general!

Baby...!

I am really struggling with this! Of course, as evidenced by Oreos, “vegan” and “all natural” aren’t at all the same thing, but I’m not an uniformed consumer. I’ve read a million studies about the dangers of ingesting all of the chemicals used in mass market make-up. Still, I haven’t reached my tipping point. Or found a swap that makes me happy. Honestly, I’m more concerned about animal testing than chemicals, but still lose my damn mind when it comes to glitter flecks. Oh well… I have my eye on Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics’ Lip Tar (though am not optimistic about the words “goes on slick and moist but dries to a satiny finish”). And until then, I know… change takes time. And I honestly believe there are worse things than loving Revlon, though I’m sure every addict on the planet has a version of that sentence to get them through the day. Have you made the switch? If yes, what’s working for you? If not, whoo whee… you’re gonna love Shine City!

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I don’t mean I think I’m all that, all of the time. Not at all. But insecurity about looks is its own form of vanity. I do so much day-to-day upkeep that it is a small wonder I have time to do anything else. I will not leave the house without concealer, mascara, blush, earrings, and (duh) lipgloss. That’s a look I call “no makeup,” and it is reserved for the flu or Sundays. Usually I also curl my eyelashes, add bronzer, highlighter, and eyeshadow or eyeliner. I wear shaping garments daily. I must have my nails painted and if they chip I can focus on nothing else until they are fixed (see easily distracted, above). And my hair is the bane of my existence – it is (per me) frizzy, simultaneously puffy and limp, and always looking crazy. I spend all of my disposable income on my hair – fancy ombre colour and cute bangs are not cheap. Neither are the million products I put in it (shampoo, conditioner, colour restorer, leave-in conditioner, curl enhancer, and finish-spray.)

Yup. Fake Hair. Photo by Jazmin Corona

I also wear fake hair all of the time. Not for special occasions or anything. Just because it’s, you know, a Tuesday. So you know what I would never, ever, ever do? SHAVE MY HEAD!!!!!!

Which is why I am so impressed with the folks over at St. Baldricks, an organization committed to raising money to fund pediatric cancer research. They organize head-shaving events world-wide, and fund more in childhood cancer research grants than any other entity besides the U.S. government. But back it up. People are SHAVING OFF THEIR HAIR to raise money for research and to show solidarity with children who are fighting cancer?!?! Dang! That has “no makeup” beat by a mile.

I found out about St. Baldrick’s because I am a friend and supporter of Donna’s Good Things, an organization that works to “provide joyful opportunities for children facing adversity, be it economic, familial, social or health related.” Simple things – dance lessons, music classes, a party – that help make a long day-to-day struggle easier to bear. The foundation honours my pal Sheila’s daughter Donna, who I never got to meet but who seems like she was my kind of kid: silly, sweet, bright, and fond of tutus. Their motto is “choose hope.” Not just hope for the future, but today – finding and choosing the thing that will help you get through, even love, today. Hence, the “good things,” the small(ish) gestures that make today a good day. Because for some, today is all anyone can guarantee.

Donna Quirke Hornick

Donna’s Good Things is participating in a St. Baldrick’s Shave-A-Thon in a few weeks, and this week they have an anonymous donor who is matching every donation to the event. For me, this is a no-brainer. I have been known to regularly spend $15 on an “emergency” manicure or a pair of “emergency” lip glosses (in case the one doesn’t “go” with what I’m wearing). And since I don’t think they’ll be having a “Dramatically Rip Out My Weave-A-Thon” any time soon, this is as close as I’ll get to participating in the event. Maybe you’ll join me? You can find information about the event (which, BTW, is taking place at my favourite pizza place!) here.

In the meantime, let me know… what’s YOUR “Good Thing?” You’ll never guess what mine is… Ja ja ja…

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Photo by Ali Weiss Klinger

I’m a semi-regular contributor to Paper Machete, a live news magazine that happens (for FREE!) every Saturday at the Horseshoe Lounge here in Chicago. Basically, what it is is a bunch of mostly funny people getting together to perform short pieces about the news of the week, plus some cultural commentary and musical acts. The way it works is that performers “choose” a topic and then go for it. I have to put “choose” in “quotes” because I am always strongly encouraged to “choose” a specific topic that is always THE LEAST FUNNY THING A PERSON COULD POSSIBLY BE ASSIGNED TO WRITE ABOUT! I’m not even joking. First, it was LESBIAN TORTURE CLINICS IN ECUADOR! And last week, it was Chicago Is Most Segregated City in America. Weirdly, it was MUCH easier to make a funny piece about torture clinics, because I am a lesbian, I grew up in Ecuador, and I happen to be an expert on torture, if by “expert” one means “I got a PhD by writing about the role of torture and violence in shaping U.S. national identity,” which is exactly what I mean when I say expert. But segregation is a more difficult topic, because to talk about it honestly is to implicate the very kind of audience who stereotypically attend performance events in Lincoln Square or who listen to WBEZ, where this show is also podcasted. WHY, Chris Piatt, WHY? (Chris Piatt, btw, is the man who got me into all of this, and I’m just telling you right now… it is very hard to say No to him. He is charming, and exuberant, and clever, and also will not take no for an answer.)

I guess one, if by “one” you mean “Chris Piatt,” would ask “who better to perform essays about segregation and lesbian torture clinics for than the ones implicated in your critique?” Actually, that’s just me making up that rationale, but I’m sure he would agree.

If you’re curious about how I handled a semi-funny piece about Chicago segregation, you can check it out right here, on the WBEZ page. And lesbian torture clinics in Ecuador? Here. For the record, I don’t make jokes about violence. Or segregation. That stuff is for real for real serious. Instead, I make fun of myself, jealousy induced arson, insurance fraud, and Change.org, throw in a few line-dancers, and wrap it all up with a few lip gloss one-liners. Easy, peasy. What you got next for me, folks? War? Poverty? Health hazards of gel manicures? WHAT YOU GOT?!

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In real life, I don't smoke. For real.

Well, Amores, lately I’ve been a little bit on the down low. Oh sure, you can catch me live and in person in any one of about a zillion-trillion meetings, classes, panels, workshops, or rehearsals, but alas… the internets have been quiet for me lately. Someone even complained that I haven’t been posting on FB! Ja! Usually the main complaint I get about my FB is “do you really think about racism that early in the morning?” (Er… my partner likes to tell this story that once when we were first dating, I woke her up at 3 in the morning to talk about how Glamour magazine’s coverage of international genocide was really headed downhill…so… yeah…)

But I’ve also been self-censoring. Sure, I have lots to be overjoyed about. Over at Free Street, the youth are in the home stretch of creating a performance about how social media shapes relationships and revolutions. LOVE! And my other project, Unnatural Spaces, kicked off two weeks ago with the most dynamic, charming, right-on group of poets the world has ever seen. (We’ll live up to that promise, I promise!) And I have a collaboration with the Poetry Foundation coming up in April, where they’ve paired me with a composer to make a new piece based on my poems and his music. And I’ll also be debuting at 2nd Story in April. And I’m still popping in at Paper Machete. And Vocalo. And I’m in fundraising mode for the Mutant Chihuahua play, which we’ll be doing in January 2013. And and and…

So why self-censoring? One of my many recent gigs has been to “comment on” the production of Race at The Goodman, and some of my comments were quoted in the Sun-Times, and I have just been shocked (re-shocked? I mean, this isn’t a new realization for me) at how many people think that to name white racism, or even race at all, is in itself racist. Say wha? Huh? For real? And I have been, of late, thrust into so many one-on-one conversations about race with people who fundamentally do not share the same language, or knowledge of history, or (as my brilliant friend Mica Cole puts it) same basic facts that I’m exhausted. It’s all of these arguments based on rhetoric, and while I was a debate team aficionado in my youth, now that I’m old and tired I do not want to have arguments with no foundation in reality. This isn’t an attempt to throw away dissenting opinion– it is possible to note the same facts and data and come to different conclusions, and then we can have an awesome argument. But so many of these “conversations” are based on affect, on feelings, and how many conversations with a perfect stranger can I have about how their “feeling” that as white people, they are “damned if they do, damned if they don’t?” That POC are “so angry.” That it is “harder to be white now than black.” Etc etc etc, all direct quotes I’ve heard about a dozen times each in the past 3 weeks. I get it. I really do. But the time to have these “conversations” is not for 5 minutes after a panel or, worse, in ugly Comments Page exchange where it is clear nobody is reading your thoughtful, took-you-20-minutes-to-write-and-includes-a-dozen-citations-and-links-to-further-reading response to their vitriolic statement that all “you people” want to do is complain. I am, in fact, a white person, but I won’t make the obvious and ugly connection (well, not too explicitly) because I really do care about interracial dialogue. I really do think it is hard. I really do think “well-meaning white people” (hear THAT all the time, too) need a space to work stuff out, to process, to feel anger, grief, denial, to come to their own conclusions – based  on real information. That takes time, and space, and I don’t have that right now (see above). So instead I keep getting into these highly charged exchanges that make me tired, and crabby, and want to write mean twitters, and say snarky things on FB, and scowl at strangers and you know what? I am not (self) called The Lovely and Talented Coya Paz for nothing. I really try to be lovely as much as I can. You know, kind. Smiley. Open. It doesn’t always work, but when I feel I am losing that aspect of my personality, I think it is important to retreat into happy spaces… Rehearsals with my awesome casts. My Hip-Hop (in) Theatre class. A snuggle with my baby. L’oreal LeGloss in CLEAR, aka Naturally Nude. It is, seriously, amazing. And appropriate for all shades and temperaments. A unifying kind of lip gloss, if you will….

So that’s what’s up, y’all… I’m tired. A lil’ crabby. And trying to work it out with some grace. What you got?

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Well… here’s a review of Windy City Queer that just happens to call my piece “hilarious.” Yay!

Coming soon… I’m a vegan, but I hate all-natural makeup! I’ll tell you why when I finish giving feedback on a dozen scripts. Uff.

Snapped this on the sidewalk in Pilsen!

Now we’re gearing up to create a BRAND NEW SHOW called Unnatural Spaces, about urban toxicity and environmentalism in Chicago. I’m so excited about this piece, which will take up a much needed conversation about urban environmentalism, especially from the perspective of people in marginalized communities who are most affected by urban toxicity. If you know my work, you know already this won’t be a “preachy” piece – hell, with all the chemicals it takes to maintain my “natural red hair,” I’m almost as bad for the environment as any factory! My hope is that together, we’ll write a piece that is complicated, honest, and (of course) funny. Interested in participating? Here’s what you might want to know:

-Auditions are December 7th. To sign up, or to get official information about this from the Guild, please go here.

-You don’t need to be an accomplished performer to be a wonderful asset to the team! One, I really believe that most people have inherent theatrical skills. Can you tell a joke? A funny story? Juicy gossip? Flirt? Stare down an enemy? Then you’re already performing! Two, one of the goals of the Incubator is to help poets develop performance skills, so we do a lot of hands on vocal and physical work as part of the process.

-You do need to be team oriented – the Incubator is about working collaboratively, writing with and for each other. And it is about writing for a larger project, which means that not everything you write as part of the process will end up in the show. (But of course, whatever you write is yours to keep – and who can’t use a little extra push to generate work?)

-I am most interested in working with people who have something specific to say, and a unique way of saying it. This should be obvious, but lots of poets are lazy. We pick words because they rhyme, not because they’re the best fit for what we’re trying to say. We rely on cliches and pre-made metaphors instead of crafting our words carefully, looking for the most true thing we can say about our own lives and ideas. We construct the rhythm of our poems to sound like poems we’ve already heard, instead of really listening for the sound of our own experience. When I cast for the Incubator, I am looking for people who will tell our audiences something they don’t already know or – even better – make the everyday seem surprising. Does this sound like a lot of pressure? I hope not! The Incubator is a space for lots of different people with lots of different ideas about what makes a “good” poem. I’m just saying – bring YOURSELF to the audition, not some outside idea of what a poet should be.

-Finally, it takes a long time to make a show. We’re holding auditions in December 2011 for a show that doesn’t open until October 2012! This doesn’t mean we rehearse everyday (or even every week) for 10 months, but it is a longterm commitment. It’s also fun, challenging, and comes with a small stipend to sweeten the deal.

AUDITION!

It is a collection of  ”LGBTQ Dispatches From the Third Coast” and one of the dispatches was written by ME! I’ll admit… I’m notoriously shy about publication, but it is a really good feeling to scan a table of contents and see your name in it. It makes me think it would be an even better feeling to look at the COVER of a book and see my name on it, so maybe I’ll get on that someday.

In the meantime, there are two ways for you to find out what I had to offer as a dispatch (spoiler alert: it is funny, crabby, and references my favourite song, which is the mariachi version of A Puro Dolor). 1.) You could buy the book, which is a great idea because it is edited by the wonderful Kathie Bergquist and includes writing by SO MANY WRITERS I LOVE: Sharon Bridgforth, Achy Obejas, avery r. young, kay ulanday barrett, David Kodeski and more. And 2.) you can come to one of the book signings where I’ll be reading from the book. If you don’t have a book for me to sign, then I can sign something else. I’m not a rockstar, and I am in a LTR with a kid, though NOT married  (whoops, that’s another spoiler alert!) so it is better if the something is not a body part.

Wednesday November 17th
Windy City Queer Reading and Book Signing
57th Street Books
7pm
FREE!

Thursday November 17th
Windy City Queer Reading and Book Signing
Bucket O’ Blood Books
7pm
FREE!

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First, my friend Amy gave me some lip gloss for my birthday. One was the L’Oreal Le Gloss Red Ravishing I raved about in my last lipgloss post. The other one — a L’Oreal Le Gloss in a colour called Violet Attitude– I pretended to be excited about but planned to give away first chance I get. I mean… violet? C’mon! But I’m glad I tried it, because 1.) it looks really good and does not, as I suspected, bring out the yellow in my teeth or clash with my hair and 2.) offers a pop of fun colour that gives a little more “oomph” than gold or beige but doesn’t have the “I am serious” or “I am about to seduce you” quality of red. Violet says: I’m not afraid of colour! I like to have fun! I am not really hungover! And honestly… I’m not sure why I ever doubted Amy (sorry, Amy). Because she is gorgeous, stylish, and a founding member of my sorority: Phi Delta Femme.

As for the coral, I realize it probably doesn’t sound too far outside of orange. But often, corals remind me of Miami in the 80′s, and I’m just not in to that look. Recently, though, I stumbled into a brow waxing appointment looking like I hadn’t slept in days (which I hadn’t). Julia at Salon V fixed my brows, trimmed my bangs, and touched up my makeup. When she pulled out the coral lip gloss, I rolled my eyes, wondering why platinum blondes are always trying to stick weird colours on my lips. But oh Lord. This product is gorgeous! It’s Aveda NourishMint Rehydrating Lip Glaze in Sun Kissed Melon, and it looks shiny, and luscious, and just a shade beyond a neutral, which makes it feel both special and appropriate for everyday use. Plus, it tastes and smells like mint. Technically, it is a glaze, not a gloss, so it is a little bit thicker than some products and deposits a little more colour. On the downside, it is kind of pricey, but a little goes a long way, so I’m hoping it lasts awhile.

So… the takeaway? Ask a gorgeous, well put-together woman you know for her suggestion about how you might expand your colour repertoire. But remember: in both cases, I was not putting any of my own money on the line. The first was a gift and the second was a sample (though I did end up buying the product after I checked it out in daylight.) Don’t just go throwing your money around at random colours. But take a risk. But be brave. They’re your lips. You wear them everyday.

Tour Guides. Opens Friday. Worth Seeing. Tickets and Information at guildcomplex.org.

I found this here: http://designspiration.net/image/33165/

Amores, The Americans closed on Saturday night and today I’m jumping in to tech for TOUR GUIDES v.3, which opens on Friday. Wait a second, wait a second! some of you might be thinking… didn’t you do TOUR GUIDES last year? Haven’t I already seen this show?

Yes. And No.

TOUR GUIDES is a project of the Poetry Performance Incubator at the Guild Complex, which brings poets from across the city to collaborate together on making theatrical work. We did a one weekend version of it three years ago, a three weekend run of it last December, and we decided to bring it back one more time before moving on to our next new piece (Unnatural Spaces, coming next fall!). TOUR GUIDES is a love letter to Chicago, and like the city we write about, the show changes every time we put it up. This version (v.3) features a new cast, new stories, but the same great show so many people loved.

We’ll be going up at the Arts Center, Logan Square – Avondale (which also hosted The Americans.) The Arts Center is a new space and very interested in having conversations about what arts spaces can do in, and to, a community. We know that the arts can be central to community building, can heal rifts, can energize, can revitalize. But we also know that new art spaces often facilitate neighborhood change in ways that exclude or push out long term residents. TOUR GUIDES – a play created by writers from largely marginalized communities describing their experience of living in this city- is part of an attempt to open up conversation about these topics and more. At the same time, it is funny. Sweet. Honest. A review of the previous iteration of the show noted that we find “ways to push boundaries and draw audiences in to a place that feels both like home, and completely new.” Sound like something you want to see? Pos, come on over!

TOUR GUIDES

 
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